Gossip Girl Review: The Wrong Goodbye

'The Wrong Goodbye'
A pretty decent finale to a rubbish series

Previously on Gossip Girl: Charlie is crazy if she doesn’t take her pills, Blair is engaged, but the Prince has given her an ultimatum to open up to him, Chuck realised what an idiot he’s been, Daddy Thorpe turned out to be more murderer than idiot, and then promptly locked Blair on the roof…

Urgh, why is Vanessa still around? On a side note “the last time this happened she ended up wandering through the snow in her bare feet.” Does this mean they finally got in touch with Aunt Carol to find out what was wrong with Charlie? And what the hell are those pills for? Because there’s a massive difference between barefoot snow wandering and stripping off and telling a boy to ‘call her serena’.

Good god, of this pair Serena is actually being the more mature one. I never thought I’d see the day…

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BROMANCE??? Nate and Dan are pitiful together now. I feel cheated.

“I’m hoping it’s just a crazy misunderstanding and not actual crazy.” Oh Dan you’re so sweet and trusting and naïve. Surely you’ve learnt something other than takedowns in your UES time, like HOW TO RECOGNIZE COMPLETE AND UTTER LOONYBIN? I mean come on, you shared an apartment with Georgina…

Nate on the other hand has the best reaction ever. *laughter* “Woah, are you sure?” *followed by more laughter*

“What’s Chuck doing here? Gossip Girl said he was going to rehab.”
“Yeah, that’s another long story.”

First off, Dan, when did you start trusting gossip girl for everything?
And secondly, when is anything ever NOT a long story on this show? Surely you guys must have worked out some sort of shorthand code for these situations involving pictures/hand movements for ‘set up’ ‘framed for murder’ ‘evil uncle’ and ‘fake blast’ ?

I take that back, their bromance is on the rise again with Dan’s hurt looks and Nate’s pacifying act.

I wish Chuck would actually pay attention to Eleanor Waldorf – unfortunately he’s too busy sniffing out the bad news of Blair not making her grand entrance. Sigh. Why did it always have to be him to work out when she’s in trouble?

On a side note, why does this feel less like a social gathering and more a chance to show off this week’s band?

Ahahaha, throw back to old school gossip girl, everyone converging in the same place yelling “I need to talk to you!” Although why Vanessa is still being included in this is completely beyond me.

“Ok whoa, just tell me no one’s trying to stop a wedding/run a Ponzi scheme/ give anyone fake cancer or turn into a justifiably vengeful townie.” I LOVE ERIC SO MUCH RIGHT NOW.

Love how Vanessa and Serena trying to outdo each other basically means Nate can’t say anything.

“You’re kind of cute!”
“I’m still gay.”
“That means you can dance!”
Do I need to tell you how much I love Eric again?

Also, Chuck = bum. Sure ok Uncle Jack talked some sense into him, but he has some serious issues to work through before he can even hope of winning Blair back after what he did. And I sure hope she tells him so. Otherwise I’m gonna be pissed. And probably rant a lot.

“So if she’s not here, not at home and not at the party, then where is she?” *phone rings* TADA! Tied up in your building! Congratulations Bass for having the worst timing for acquiring building sites where dainty bodies can be so easily tossed.

Yeah Blair, if he hasn’t tied you up, you really think the door’s gonna open? This is an evil murdering mastermind with at least a six episode arc after all, not some one episode crook.

I bet you fifty bucks Chuck doesn’t bother phoning the cops before he goes, cos that would make it too easy…

As I said in last week’s recap, I find it really hard to feel any real emotion about Blair’s plight when we know that nothing is actually going to happen to her. Maybe some emotional scarring, but that’s about it. So yay for the lighter, let’s hope Daddy Thorpe accidentally sets light to himself.

Georgina darling! With a rock! And a bloke showing off baby pictures! My my, she has been busy. Although she seems less happy now than she is when she’s scheming.

“Wanted a hot wife to impress his partners and I wanted a loft and a Yale legacy for Milo – now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to go and get drunk enough for you to all seem interesting.”

Whilst I love her all over again already, I have to wonder, why is she here?... Did she ever go to Constance? Or is the bloke a St Judes?

“Oh of course you’d be here!” I am totally with Dan on this one. Also love his showcase of looks when he turns and sees her.

“I can tell that you’re up to something. Please let me in on it, I haven’t been this bored since I believed in Jesus.” I love Georgina. She has the wit and fabulousness of series old! Why is there not more of this stuff in every episode?!

“The last thing I’d want would be Georgina Sparks getting involved.”
“Not unless the thing was twisted and nasty! In which case my help could prove invaluable!”

Hey! Lily! You haven’t decomposed upstairs whilst watching numerous reruns of Downton Abbey!

He’s a good son?! He’s freaking awesome! For all Lily’s whinging about her kids, yes she did a crap job with Serena, but Eric turned out awesomely!

I like Charlie when she’s off her pills – it livens everything up.

She’s good… Also, love that Dan says “We’re going to need a plan B” just as Georgina looks like the second coming.

Does everywhere just have on nice photo of Blair and Serena in uniform? Because that one photo is used for everything. It’s getting boring. We have two series of them in uniform – pick another photo!

Strangely Headmistress Queller’s little interlude with Serena sounds just right – I so know that speech from teachers when you go back and tell them what you’ve done since you buggered off. Sigh. They’re always so disappointed…

“How could you not end up with Nate or Dan? We both voted on Gossip Girls poll and we both lost. So who did you end up with? The billionaire or the guy who tried to kill you?” WHO LET THESE CHILDREN IN? And why do they seem to have more brains than anyone other than Eric or Charlie?

“I’ve actually become a Bedford wife – and it’s really just the worst thing. Please let me in on whatever scheme everyone seems to be a part of. I haven’t conspired since I convince Dan he was Milo’s dad – unless you count speeding up the process at the hospice to get someone’s apartment.”

Seriously, I just love pretty much anything that comes out of Georgina’s mouth at the moment.

Pointing at Vanessa “I’m sorry, she’s a part of the game but I’m not?!” See! Even Georgina understands and appreciates Vanessa’s true worth.

Oh they should have let Georgina play…

Urgh, Daddy Thorpe you are destined to fail.

“I’m calling 911!” NATE! YOU HAVE BRAINS! Although maybe a little later than needed…

Oh I’m so glad Blair isn’t blinded by what Chuck’s done to her. “He treated me like something he owned rather than earned, and it destroyed me.”

That fell a bit flat for me. I kind of expected, I don’t know, more. Yay she got the lighter off him, but it just was a bit. Ok, we’re done, let’s all troop out now and let him potentially get away or do something stupid whilst the cops arrive.

Ha, love the explanation for why Blair didn’t call the cops.

And the fact that Chuck is kind of being a grown up about this. Is he growing as a person?

I’m not convinced, but this conversation goes a little way towards healing the massive ‘I hate you Chuck for hurting Blair’ shaped hole in my heart.

Why would Raina prefer to go back to a hotel in Chicago to a hotel in New York? She no longer has any family anywhere apart from Nate, who will most likely stay in New York. Where is her logic?

I’m not fussed though. I’ve been bored by her storyline all the way through. She never seemed to have any chemistry with Chuck or Nate, and I didn’t believe either of the relationships either. So I’m glad she’s finally going.

I hate that I love it, but I do love it. Chuck and Blair back to being them. Taking a night off and crashing another party, and pretending to be other people who aren’t hurting or stressed or worried or having to make huge decisions.

Loving drunk Charlie.
Also love that Georgina knows which window in the whole school is the one that opens.

“What if in seventeen years your kid is in trouble and needed help?”
“If Milo isn’t in trouble in seventeen years then I’ve done something wrong.”

“I miss you! You get me!” Why is she not a regular?! Ah yes, because if they had her awesome full time they’d forget it and turn it into sludge, just like every other talent on this… Sigh…

I can’t help but smile at Chuck and Blair…
This doesn’t mean you’re completely forgiven Bass.

Ha Vanessa! In your face. You are no longer welcome in this room/loft/show.

If she takes that manuscript I am going to hunt her down. Otherwise, I am super excited to see more of this manuscript of Dan’s – he could turn into gossip girl but published!

It makes me sad that they’ve only half addressed the issues between Blair and Chuck that they raised following Chuck’s drunken outburst. I want that to be resolved properly. Yes I’ve been a huge Chair fan, but I feel cheated that they did that and then two episodes later it’s all ok, just because they had a good evening.

I really hope they take the time to deal with those issues properly, otherwise the whole relationship will just be a cheap sham for me personally watching it in the future.

“I know she’ll be here.” Yeah Louis, when that line is followed by a steamy make out scene with Chuck, I think your chances just plummeted.
You may be the Prince, but she likes herself a bad boy.

Oh yay – window jumping! Well she won’t sustain any lasting damage, she’s coming back next season! God when did I get so cynical?...

I love that Dan is angry with Vanessa for going through his stuff – that girl just waltzes around doing whatever she wants. Go get angry Humphrey!

You know I think that argument was one of the most satisfying things involving Vanessa in a very long time. Love Dan a little bit right now for that.

Aw crap – she had to go and take it. I really hope he had a back up copy…

Oh Blair, I am so disappointed in you right now. Don’t give me that complex love crap. Urgh. Not going to rant again, because I’ve said it all (over and over and over again) but this just irritates me no end.

Does this mean Serena might actually start taking control of her life and making decisions next season?

Yay for sisterly bonds. But why has Charlie stopped being crazy all of a sudden? Did Serena slip her some pills?

Oh Louis you cuddly boy, someone needs to take you home and love you better. And possibly move you a few steps away from Chuck before he lashes out…

Hm, can’t decide what to think about Chuck butting in on that one. I know he thinks he’s doing the right thing for her, but I’m not convinced Louis is the right thing for her – none of the guys so far seem to be that.

Oh god – this big sorry session just feels horrible. Although I’m so glad Serena finally got off her arse and sorted things out between her Dan and Nate.

Seriously, why has the crazy magically stopped?! What were the pills? What’s wrong with her?!!?

Oh god. Well I feel better about the big I’m sorry thing, because she’s still a crazy psycho, but who’s she calling to say it went perfectly?...

Oh god this is so convoluted.

AHAHAHA! Yes. Firstly I love Georgina. Secondly, I love that Georgina can spot a faker a mile away. Thirdly, how awesome would that pairing be?! And last, omg what the hell is she playing making people think she’s on meds/off them and not at all? At least that explains the suddenly being ok randomly.

“I left the empire state building last year after two minutes when you didn’t show – Louis waited all night.”

“Guilt – I feel it too. Maybe I’m actually growing up after all.” You know what Bass, I might agree with you there.

“I didn’t want to let you go just yet.”
“Don’t let anyone ever tell you you’re not powerful. You’re the most powerful woman I know.”
“It’s taking all the power I have to walk away from you.”
“I know. But I need to let you go. You need to let go.”

You know, I think that was one of the most moving scenes the entire series. It was beautiful and it was perfect, and it showed both of them maturing and realizing that they do need to let go – at least for now. And you know what, it kind of redeemed Chuck a little in my eyes. For all my ranting, that was a pretty good way of handling it.

Although I don’t believe for a moment that that is it, and Chuck and Blair will never end up together. The producers have already said they’re end game. This is just another gap before that.

Mush mush mush. Although I am loving Dan and Blair and the fact that Blair already has Dan’s summer films all sorted and ready to go…

Charlie can’t actually leave can she?... She’s way too cool to go now!

“Well look at that – Chuck Bass maturing.” I know Nate, I think we’re all stunned.

“You’re a good friend.”
“One of us has to be.” Seriously, Nate is suddenly getting his groove back after a season of bleh. I love it – please keep this up into next season Archibald.

“Hey can I borrow your sun hat?” No. No way would Blair know which sun hat Serena was talking about. Blair can’t just have one.

First off, no way is Vanessa ever going to see those cheques reach Dan.
And second, does anyone else want to bitch slap her right now?

Um, anyone else want to cringe over that whole Serena scene? I don’t even want to comment it hurt so much…

I think my mind just got blown a little bit… What on earth is up with Carole?

Excellent – pairing of the century about to occur…

Ahaha, fab ending. Hmmmm, doubt it’s going to be Serena (given that she hasn’t had a love interest in a while.) My money is on Blair, but it’s Chuck’s child. That Gossip Girly enough for you?

So all in all a much better series end than the rest of the second half of this series. This series as a whole has been pretty disappointing, but it’s had some good moments mid season, and again with this finale. And just in time, because it managed to re-peak my interest in gossip girl enough to make me want to come back next season, which two episodes ago wasn’t look likely.

Thoughts? Opinions? Loved it or hated it? And who’s going to end up with a baby and a baby daddy next season?